Just like the weather, our marriage can change with seasons. So...we thought it would be fun to do a Marriage Mondays series on the Four Seasons of Marriage! If you've been married for any length of time (like more than a day. hehe), you know those seasons can literally change in a moments notice. Our marriage seasons don't really follow any rules of nature, necessarily. For example, Allen can head out the door in the mornings (to his full time job) and kiss me goodbye and all is well! And he may be temped to think..."she's going to have a great day! What could go wrong?" But then midday, I may call him in tears because the sky is falling and it may make absolutely no sense at all to him. He sometimes wonders how the heck I can go from on top of the world to "I think I may die" in a half a day! (Anyone else? Oh ladies, please tell me, I am NOT alone in this!!!) Anyhow, seasons in our marriage can change just that quickly as well. We can be in Summer one moment and Winter the next. One never knows!
So, right now, I'm happy to tell you that it feels like Summer in our Marriage!!! Yay!!! We are walking barefoot in the sand, hand-in-hand, on the beach, just a huggin & a kissin, & enjoying the warm sunshine! Okay, this really translates to: we smile at each other a lot these days and enjoy each others company tremendously in the midst of the daily mundane (gotta pay those bills, right?). While we are total beach people and would LOVE to basically live at the beach, we don't live at the beach and duty calls, so....our summer season includes things like: swimming in the pool at night, talking long walks after dinner, dreaming together, date nights a little more often than in the other seasons, dancing in the kitchen while dinner cooks, and sometimes even making it to the beach where Allen surfs and Carol ogles (and sneaks in a little reading time).
Even in the midst of summer tho, it feels like the occasional afternoon "thunderstorm" rolls in and we have to work thru it to get back on track. It seems like summers are for resting a bit more, playing a bit more, relaxing and enjoying the fruit of your labor! Of course, we all know that Fall is coming and soon enough we will be back on schedule, back to the grind, back to trying to find a new rhythm and plow up the fields and prepare for new seeds and growth! But in the summer season, even with the thunderstorms, it feels like we can work through it a bit quicker and get back to enjoying the playfulness & relaxed mode of summer. Let me tell you though, we have certainly been through Winter in the last year and in years past (even though we didn't quite recognize it at the time). Even Winter can bring beautiful things tho (more on that in the Winter segment. hehe) We just don't want you to be misled and think that our "kind of marriage" is unattainable and that we always "feel" in love with each other (and that we're always in the summer season). SOMETIMES WE DON'T FEEL LIKE LOVING EACH OTHER! LOVE IS AN INTENTIONAL CHOICE!
We love each other because we committed to. And love puts each other first, and love gets curious instead of getting mad, and love seeks out the other person and pursues them when things seem off. Love sure ain't no feelin, yall! Don't be deceived into thinking it is, because the time will CERTAINLY come when you do not feel in love. Whatcha gonna do then? But if you know Love is an action, a commitment, you will be prepared and know that you will put each other first and pursue each other, ESPECIALLY when you don't feel like it! Okay, I totally digressed! Just wanted you to know that we have been through tough seasons and will go thru many more, I'm sure. That's just life. There will be times when we really don't like each other and don't agree and wonder if we'll ever get things sorted out, but we will and we always do. Because LOVING each other is more important than being right!
So if you're not in a Summer Season, a season of rest, relaxation, enjoyment, playfulness in your marriage, then hang tight! DO NOT GIVE UP!!! THE BEST IS YET TO COME! Do the hard work of pressing on, praying for each other, and pursuing one another. God brought you together with your spouse for a reason and He has great plans for you 2 as a team and also as individuals! Some seasons are a bit more work than others, but each season has it's beauty!
So, here's to the 4 Seasons of Marriage! Whatever your season right now, may you fully embrace it (and each other - heehee - see the end of our last marriage mondays post for more on "hugging it out") and stay strong! Enjoy the "summer" moments in each season (they're totally there, if you look for them. Or sometimes you may need to "create" them. For example: Go for a walk; have a picnic at a lake or take a hike together; begin some new activity together; dream together; plan a vacation - one needs no money to dream! The sky is the limit...you can create a summer moment in the midst of whatever season you're in. And if you're in summer, be sure to take time to enjoy it. Don't be too busy to look up from that phone, computer, etc to look into each other's eyes and take notice of the beautiful soul that God gave you to spend your lifetime with!
Cheering you on,
Allen & Carol